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iOpen A Restaurant Review

Welcome to the iOpen a Restaurant review. Shall we get on with it?

»Scene 1 – iCarly webcast«

Drilling meat. Two words that have never been used together… Even MS Word has trouble recognizing it.

“Science Fact of The Day?” Is it possible that iCarly has connections to the people behind the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, Aperture Science, also known as Aperture Labs?

Einstein’s alive?

Never mix clam juice and soy sauce. It causes you to explode…

“Can’t argue with Science.”

Spencer drunk both liquids and now he’s ok… okay, he exploded, leaving only his shoes…

Follow @CoolEinstein! You’ll learn something new every time. He’s like Bunsen Jude “The Science Dude”.

»Sometime later«

Grandpa Shay is worried about Spencer’s wellbeing, because he exploded.

The Shays have been robbed! Someone stole the TV, and the computer…

And Spencer is wearing Carly’s bathrobe.

Don’t, Spencer!

»Title Credits«

»Scene 2 – Ridgeway High«

Carly’s showing pics the cops sent her to Freddie.

I think I know that guy…

Carly’s right, he doesn’t care.

Carly’s worried about Gibby, she says it’s not like him to miss 2 classes in a row.

Now, here’s the line that created a fan war last Saturday, “Is it too late for you to love me?”

I think this is just an outburst from Freddie. But more on that later.

Sam arrives to tell Carly and Freddie that Gibman (yeah, Gibman) is in the school basement.

Carly’s relief is evident in her voice when she says “Is he okay?” He’s okay, by Gibby standards.

Go, go with Sam.

»Some time later«

The gang arrives at the basement. It’s full of spider webs.

Gibby welcomes the gang. The way he said it reminds me of movies with brain-washing religious cults.

He has wanted to open a restaurant… for as long as he can remember. And what better location for a restaurant than a high school basement?

It could actually work, Carly…

“Dreamspitter?” That’s a new one… But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, since there are parents that name their kids “Bartzina” and Hayley Dreamsmasher Smith. Look them up.

Opening a restaurant on the roof does have its advantages… Fresh air, amazing view…

Freddie goes in to support Carly, but he asks if there would be lasagna. Personally, I don’t like lasagna. The first time I had some it was really messed up.

And then Sam asks if there would be tater tots. I don’t know if I ever had that. I don’t know what that is.

A waterpark underground, Carly? Really?

Freddie is going to follow Carly up. And Sam starts to get suspicious…

“You got a new little crush on her?” Yeah, Freddie, she did ask you that. And if I may quote the Dark Prince from Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones (I’m a nerd, sue me.) “I eagerly await your response.”

And as Freddie walks upstairs, you can see that Sam is upset about that.

See? Look at her face…

Gibby comes to the rescue, but Sam intervenes: “Too close.”

»Scene 3 – Bushwell Plaza«

Okay, now I’m starting to get a little curious. Freddie’s going back to his old ‘crushing on Carly’ ways? Let’s see who wrote this episode…

“Written by Dan Schneider and Jake Farrow”. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m sure there’s a pretty sure there’s an explanation for Freddie’s behavior. Now, to find it…

I must admit, having 37 external flashes hit your eyes simultaneously seems like a lot.

37,000? Dude, that’s impressive!

Another one?

»Scene 4 – Ridgeway High Basement – Gibby’s«

Carly and Freddie are amazed that Gibby has actually managed to open a restaurant. By now, they should have somehow realized that anything is possible in a Dan Schneider show.

Carly still can’t believe it. Two words: it’s butter.

Only cool people can eat at Gibby’s. Friends of theirs. Even though I don’t know who the guy in the right table is. Or the hot girl next to him… I think I’m in love. But I’ve never talked to her. Can any of you introduce me? Cookie for whoever gets the reference.

Red pepper on pasta? Not my cup of tea, to be honest.

Sam has a cousin who has a nose. Shocker.

“So, I’ll hook it up?”
“Hook it, baby!”

Sibby shippers must be high right now…

Red pepper lemonade? That’s a first…

And Carly’s running around looking fo- Dayum… There’s some amazing girls in this school…

Okay, okay, we get it! You don’t like the lemonade…

»Commercial break«

»Scene 6 – Gibby’s Gibby’s«

Gibby’s has a new look. Round metal tables and a more roadside diner style. That is, comparing to the roadside diners I see on TV.

There’s a kid that just returned from juvie. Billy Boots.

Gibby doesn’t take his shirt off anymore. At least, not without a good reason.

Oh, no. Someone just pissed Gibby off… And that’s not a good thing to do.

So, when you insult Gibby, you get free stuff at his restaurant?

Oh, it’s just like in Buttersock 3: Return of the Buttersock…

»Scene 7«

Spencer called Carly and Freddie in from school, to show them his new toy/security system.

I must admit, this looks quite dangerous…

Okay, 1200 ft/s… That equals about… 818.1799 miles per hour or 365.7584 meters/second. Math…

Damn, those popcorn kernels are made of what? Metal?

»Meanwhile, back at Gibby’s«

Gibby’s back… Back again…

Sam to the rescue! It still amazes me that Sam can overpower anyone. And I wish to test that.

»Meanwhile, thousands of miles away«

As I wrote this, I had a MAJOR dejá vu moment.

Spencer, Carly and Freddie are going to use Mrs. Benson as bait, to turn off the kill machine.

When all else fails, unplug the machine.

»Scene 8«

Professor Howard is back from the moon… I don’t recall if he was killed by the Decepticons…

Mr. Howard, you can see all the restaurant supplies here, so the simplest answer, and the most obvious one is, “DUH!”

All the good things come to an end… and as such, Gibby’s will close…

And they say professors aren’t nice…

What was your favorite thing about this episode? Let me know through the comments!

iApril Fools Review

Rob’s Reviews, a shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist. RobSp1derp1g, a young loner on a crusade to champion the cause of the innocent, the helpless, the powerless, in a world of criminals who operate above the law. 

Welcome, faithful readers! We bring you today my review to iApril Fools, another episode of iCarly!

First of all, I have to apologize. This review was done when I wasn’t feeling too well, and I had some stuff holding me down…

Let’s get started!

This time, the gang warns us that this is not an usual episode of iCarly. And it is not for normal people. And the answer for it is… soup.

»Title Credits«

These credits are a bit different… There’s a montage with pics of them when they started doing iCarly and how they are now. And there’s fire and lightning in the middle…

There’s a box with items which belong to @DanWarp. Here, take a look:

»Scene 1 – Bushwell Plaza, Shays’ very bare living room«

Are the Shays moving?

The Shays have been EVICTED? That is a TERRIBLE way to spend April Fools! Mine’s gonna be more creative… Then again, not that much…

I find it harder to believe that the owner’s name is Bushwell than Carly stabbed him…

10 o’clock PST? I’m on DST, so what time is that on GMT?

“Sure had a lot of good times on this place.”
“Yeah, we sure had…” Oh, God, here it comes, reminiscing time…
“Agreement.”

“You guys remember the time we were all sitting around watching that TV show?”
“What episode of that TV show?”
“You mean the one where the characters talk about crazy stuff that happened in previous episodes?” Isn’t that all TV shows?
“And then they flashback to the scenes they were talking about?” Yup, that’s ALL TV shows.

Reminiscing time!

Dan Schneider is talking in the TV! It is my belief that this is an episode (with flashback) of Head Of The Class..

That’s the 2nd time I’ve ever seen people so excited about flashbacks…

Gibby comes in from the elevator to steal something…

The new tenants are from France! *le gasp*

Gibby hit Spencer in the head with the STOP sign he stole…

But Sam tells him that is not how April Fools works… so Gibby kisses Spencer on the cheek and runs away…

They’re going away against their wishes, so they are having a party, complete with a party bush…

T-Bo’s invited too, so Sam calls him.

T-Bo’s a genie?

And T-Bo proceeds to do the same thing Gibby did, smack Spencer in the head with a STOP sign.

“Will you just take us to the next scene, please?”

Hard cut to…

»Scene 2 – Party’s location«

Freddie’s NOT partying without a party bush… He wants it so bad he starts to feel a bit ill due to not having a party bush…

That’s the power of magic. T-Bo blinks and they get a party bush… but is it me, or it’s a bit dry?

Ah, iCarly… I used to love that webshow… Now? I still do…

They are going to think back on the reason they started iCarly…

Whoa! They have suddenly been transported to school! There is some Butterfly Effect chiz going on here…

This is the event that led to the creation of iCarly… After this, Freddie uploaded Carly and Sam’s video and accidentally created iCarly…

After the final denial from Ms. Briggs, Carly and Sam the scene cuts to… What?

That’s Ms. Briggs from another universe which is not this one!!

If their energies collide, there will be an explosion with galactic proportions!

FIRE IN THE HOLE!! TAKE COVER!! That is the example of over 6 years playing Counter Strike and Call of Duty… If I may quote Jeffrey Albertson (known to many as Comic Book Guy), “life well spent!”

It’s an explosion of galactic proportions, but it’s confined to a few inches… and it’s perfectly safe to walk on the blast radius afterwards. Look:

“We should start a webshow.”
“Okay, what do we call it?”

And here’s the kicker, non-nerd Freddie actually trying to be a nerd.

And of course, who could forget Sparky.

And Freddie can move while in freeze frame!

See? What did I tell you? Going to a re-enactment of the past changed the course of Blitztory! *ghost-like whispers* Blitz…

“What time is it?” It’s time for Spencer to be hit in the head with a STOP sign, AGAIN… However, despite the caps, I find it very amusing…

Poachy? Sounds strangely familiar and delicious…

Here they go again…

Oh, the harp…

Miko?

The girls are intelligent, don’t get me wrong, I thought that girls like these had been discontinued, but sometimes they can be so thick headed!

Miko is able to predict the future… look:

Gibby, you’re violating the rules of flashingbacking!

There’s an Asian guy knocked out in your studio. You start dancing like a cowboy in Texas…

Yet another flashback. I didn’t know the Shays had a cat… Is it me, or isn’t that cat Jackson, Dan’s cat?

There’s an old saying, Gibby, and it goes like this: “Take me by the tongue and I’ll know you” See what I did there? Nah, the saying is “Payback’s a [CENSORED]”

»Commercial Break«

“We’re back!”
“Back from what?”
“I dunno…”

Let me clarify some things. I didn’t know there was such a thing as a party bush, but talking party bushes? That’s epic, dawg…

T-Bo just watered the bush…

Now, they talk about Carly’s lack of bad moods. And they are proven wrong, in a flashbacking way.

Huh? What are they doing in Tori Vega from Victorious’s house? And that’s the former blogger who alienated his friends by writing about them!!

It’s like a virus… “just leave it all to me”

Spencer’s really long hair… like a lady’s.

It was when iSaved Your Life aired. “12 million viewers…”

Spencer’s ladylike hair…

Here comes Mr. Bushwell.

Just one question, why does Gibby take down his pants when he gets depressed?

Think back, Mr. Bushwell…

Look! It’s the Doc! He brings a warning!

Go back to a future episode!!

And here’s the obvious reference to Back to the Future, in which there is a mention to the possibility of Seddie children.

And T’bo’s time machine!!

This episode shows that you don’t need to have a storyline to have a good time… Stupid line, I know…

And again, I’m sorry about the delay.

iMeet The First Lady Review

“I got a pocket got a pocketful of sunshine, I got a love and i know that it’s all mine oh oh oh oh…” *sees camera* Oh, sh*bleep*…

First of all, I’d like to apologize for a few things. First, this embarrassing scene you just witnessed. Second, the delay in the iBloop 2 and iBalls. There have been some complications of the creative nature and others. Now that is dealt with, welcome to the iMeet The First Lady review!

As the name states, the First Lady Michelle Obama will guest star as herself. Seriously, who’s next, the Pope?

»Scene 1: The Shays’ apartment«

Carly and Freddie are holding up a banner saying “Welcome Home, Dad”.

I don’t know if you guys ever saw the Simpsons Movie, but if you have, I’d like to direct your attention to a specific part of it. When Itchy is in the White House, and Scratchy calls, from the moon, and holds a placard saying “I’m telling.” The sound there totally applies here…

Sam is tying a balloon to Freddie’s phone, which she took from him without him noticing… And they are made of incredibly low quality materials…

After this, Gibby enters. By now, Word should recognize Gibby as a word…

Aww, a family reunion…

Gibby, I think we already established that 2 seasons ago… Spencer is Carly’s BROTHER!!

“You deserved that.” He totally did.

Wait… Spencer suited up?

Lawyers don’t run… Unless you’re Marshall Ericksen.

Spencer set an icecream truck on fire? I didn’t think it was possible…

Spencer, I think you would have learned by now. You and electronics of any kind DO NOT MATCH!!

»Scene 2 – Shays’ apartment«

Sam and Freddie just entered…

Oh, Spencer’s puppy dog eyes… It won’t work…

Ms. Carly Shay’s timing is amazing!!

“Junior fighter Carly Shay?”

Spencer sends the kids running, and calls them weenies.

“Some people are just born with the Weenie gene.” Oh, is it like the ATA gene, that allows Tau’ri to control Ancient, or Lantean, technology? Don’t know what I’m talking about? It’s Stargate, look it up.

“Carly, sometimes in life…” “I know, a man and a woman fall in love and they get special feelings…” Okay, I’m gonna stop you right there, because that’s not what Spencer wants to say.

Spencer looks kind of disgusted…

Unfortunately Coronel Steven Shay can’t come home right now…

»Scene 3 – Prepping the iCarly studio for a live webcast«

Gibby’s true identity revealed? No, that Japanese guy is called Don.

“See ya at the club.” “Later, Gib.”

Carly’s still upset that her dad’s not coming home for his birthday…

“She won’t be upset when… SHUT UP, SHE’S WALKING IN!!” Smooth, Gibby, smooth…

Starting the webcast.

Carly’s visibly upset, and that’s impacting the show in a negative way…

Okay, Sam just revealed that they have a surprise for Carly.

A Birthday iParty? How does that work?

A live webchat to a secure USAF base… Let’s see Freddie break some state and federal laws.

And this looks like Skype, doesn’t it?

But the image is scrambled due to the nature of the secure connection…

“Hey, dad!” “I’m a lawyer!” No, you’re not, Spencer…

Here’s a question: why does it spell “Colonel” when you CLEARLY read Coronel?

Carly’s a snug bug…

A small chat over the Internet with their dad. Almost feels like he’s there…

“Okay, Colonel Shay, get excited ‘cause it’s time for…“ a song, a plane-shaped cake and the American flag!

“Happy birthday Colonel Shay.
Today’s the day that you were born.
We wish that you could be here with us
‘Cause if you were, we would give you a hug.
We bought a cake-shaped fighter plane
And… paid for with your credit card!

When Spencer “lights the candles”, Freddie’s already out of the splash zone…

“Nice work, Spencer…”

A few heartfelt words from the youngest Shay… I honestly thought she was going to cry…

Now, a word of advice from a world-renowned scientist: me.

Whenever there is a substance that has found its way to the highest point of a division, say, a ceiling, never, EVER, under any circumstances, ask the location of the substance. Those who do are fated to have the substance fall on their face.

»Scene 4 – 8th floor hallway«

The iCarlies have just arrived from school, I guess. They are carrying backpacks…

A group hug… Ready the “Aw…” machine, Phoebe… Fire! Aw…

Wait, 3 guys in suits… It finally happened! Barney Stinson has moved to Seattle! Or someone reads his blog…

These 3 guys are government-brand bouncers… but I think they wear black ties…

Oh, boy… you guys are in trouble…

»Commercial break«

What are the bouncers looking for?

“Your recent iCarly webcast caught the attention of someone very high up in the US government…” That’s good, right? The more people watch iCarly, the more people will like it and refer it to their friends.

Any more trouble?

“Don’t leave town…” I get that a lot… Not really, but still…

»Scene 5 – Rigdeway high«

Carly and Freddie are always looking over their shoulders…

I must admit, I love Sam in that hair… I love Jennette in any hairdo, but I really like her with that hair on…

She got wigs? Why? And passports? What are you planning, Puckett?

She wants to go to Amsterdam? Personally, I think Panama would be best… no extraditation agreements. How do I know this? WAY too much Prison Break.

Ahh! The government-brand bouncers are back!!

Am I supposed to be surprised that Sam knows this procedure by heart?

»Meanwhile, thousands of miles away…«

As the bouncers arrive at Bushwell Plaza’s 8th floor, the kids get scared…

“We’re just simple children of the internet…”

18 engagement rings? It’s Pam, I shouldn’t be surprised, but STILL…

Someone high in the US government hierarchy. Even higher than the President… I guess that proves that behind a great man, there’s always a great woman… Phoebe’s behind me, she made me write this.

It’s… It’s the… It’s the First Lady of the United States of America! *fake surprise gasp* I never even saw that coming!

Spencer is describing to the First Lady the events of iScream in Holloween…

“My mom voted for your husband…”

It’s amazing how out-of-tune T-Bo is… He sees the First Lady and all he does is try to flirt with her…

Oh, he just saw who she is…

“Your Excellency…”
“You don’t call her your excellency…”
“No, no, I kinda like it.”

“Her husband is the President…” Really, Spencer?

Who’s the lady on the right? I think I’ve seen her before…

Did Sam just interrupt the First Lady?

Samantha Puckett has problems with authority…

And T-Bo interrupts again. By now, the real Secret Service agents aka the government-brand bouncers would have kicked T-Bo’s butt to next year.

Now, I know that the First Lady Michelle Obama is not a professional actress, but this reaction is just, well, not good.

»iCarly webcast, upstairs«

The First Lady of the United States of America is playing a game which is hard to play, and the rules are not clear…

3 points for Mrs. Obama.

Of course, even iCarly advertises.

Now’s the time for a nice surprise… Some say that he has some terrible plans involving the moon, and where ever you are in the world if you tune your radios to 88.4 FM, you can actually hear his thoughts. All we know is, he’s Dan Schneider.

Dan’s first iCarly cameo. It’s ‘bout time he made one.

Random Presidential Dancing!! Even Dan joins in!

This episode was very funny, Dan’s cameo was unexpected… And the epic First Lady part was awesome.

But, this review has some political implications. And here it is:

In Soviet Union, review reads you.

Have a good night.

SUPER HUGE SPOILER ALERT!!!

Here at RobSp1derp1g’s iCarly Reviews, we don’t know the meaning of the word “stop”. So, if we find something even remotely interesting, we jump right on it, with my faithful companion, Phoebe, and my trademark shovel.

This time, we found ourselves some really awesome news. This is a piece of news that completely rocks the free world, though not like iOMG.

Having said this, I will now announce the spoiler. This spoiler is not to be taken lightly.

The First Lady of the United States, or FLOTUS1, as her nickname on the Simpsons, will guest star on iCarly! It’s not every day that a renowned world figure will guest star on a show like iCarly.

To this I say only one thing, The Land of the Free and The Home of the Brave!

And now, I wanted to leave you with a version of the Star-Sprangled Banner played on an electric guitar, but I couldn’t embed it on the blog.

iStart a Fan War – Review

Hello, guys! Here we are, back from Webicon. Here at RobSp1derp1g’s iCarly Reviews, we must say that it was a fruitful experience. Why is that? Because I have never actually been in a convention like that. But I think I might actually start going, because then I’d have the possibility to find an amazing yet fairly unknown actress called Jennette McCurdy. Any of you heard of her? Me neither…

First and foremost, I must announce something. *serious lights are turned on* I have been rewarded with the oportunity of having another Seddieshipper working with me here. So, everyone, please give a hot welcome (warm seems too little) to omgwtfEmily! She’s the new author for this blog an will be working with me here on my reviews and speculations.

Anyway, I can see you guys are looking a bit glum. If you’re wondering how I can see you, the answer is simple. I’m in a dim-lighted-deep-underground-location-unknown-super-secret evil lair of doom. Do the math. As to why you guys are glum, it’s not my fault “The O.C.” ended. I liked Shailene Woodley, even though I never actually saw her on this show, as Mischa Barton’s little sister.

Oh, you’re sad about the whole “Seddie vs. Creddie” thing. About that, I have 2 words: READ BELOW.

One thing I have noticed about this episode is that we don’t know who has written the episode. Why is that?

Review, I choose you! Oh, I forgot, this isn’t Pokémon.

The episode starts with Carly and Freddie entering school. They’re discussing something with “lots of different kinds.” And it’s not actually discussing, it’s more like bothering, because only Freddie is talking.

40 grid, 60 grid, 80 grid, Huh? You lost me. No, wait. Freddie didn’t lose me. He never had my attention.

Turns out that they’re talking about sandpaper. Interesting topic.

Sam has a lunchbag, a rare sight, rare sight indeed… Pam is trying to be a better mom.

I don’t live in the States, but I don’t think that in the USA, one’s two best friends would inspect one’s lunchbag.

Also, only Pam Puckett would send a C battery in her daughter’s lunchbag.

You can’t really blame her for trying, Sam.

And there he is… Walking down the stairs of Ridgeway High… Adam. There is also wind that shakes Adam’s clothes. Ah, Hollywood…

Oh, Carly’s got a crush on Adam… *half an hour later* shhhhhhhhh…

Whoa, why are Adam’s clothes being pushed back?

Gibby has a fan… I guess Dan had to do it…

Freddie’s not that upset about Adam… Could this mean…

“And he’s coming this way.””Shut up and be cool!”

»»»»» Adam’s Guide to Talking With Girls: «««««

1- When talking to a girl, instead on telling her she’s pretty, make a remark on what she’s holding. If she has a crush on you, she’ll ignore the comment and carry the conversation from there.

When do things go as well as we hope, Carly?

— Title Sequence —

You guys know I usually skip this and go directly to the episode, right? Well, not this time.
This time, I’ll show you something that has intrigued me.

The first thing you might notice is Freddie’s arm around Sam. Yeah, I know, hard to miss. Even more so after I marked it. But for now, please focus on the microphones. The only episodes where microphones were used were iDo, iStart a Fanwar and due to the nature of the episode, iParty With Victorious. Since the first two already aired, I guess the next big scene will happen on iParty With
Victorious.
Now you can look at Freddie’s arm.

»»» Location: Bushwell Plaza, iCarly Studio «««

The girls got a question from frogpunch99. These fans have amazing questions. They don’t ask if you can cook a pickle with a blowtorch. They ask how to do it correctly. Excellent question.

We discover that Socko has a cousin which is a professional welder. His name is Bernie. He proceeds to burn the pickle.

Carly and Sam got news for us guys! It turns out that they’re going to Webicon!!

They wanted to go last year, but they were kidnapped by a super-crazy-psycho fan who locked them in her basement. Nora even tried to kill Gibby, but she was brought down by him ans his younger brother, who has a nack for saying “Happy Birthday.”

“Gibbeh…” No offense or anything, but right now, Gibby sounded like a Pokémon.

Answer questions, which will be totally unrelated to the love lives of the cast, sign autographs, meet fans, who make assumptions about the love lives of the cast…

“Mr. Pickle’s gonna feel that tomorrow…” I love that accent.

»»» Timeskip to: Carly’s new room «««

More sandpaper talk… Who cares about that? Freddie, apparently, and not Carly.

Whoa, Spencer is playing World of Warcraft… I mean World of Warlords… Yeah, that is totally what I meant…

That is how a WoW (glad the acronym is still the same.) player plays the game. He or she yells incessantly at their opponents, despite the fact that they know they can’t hear him or her.

“Enjoy your ghostly stroll from the graveyard…” Actually, I play WoW. And I must say that the ghostly stroll from the graveyard isn’t that bad… If you find your body, you can ressurect for free…

Whoa, they turned to Carly at the same time… Intense…

“It’s not a game, it’s a lifestyle…” If by any chance Dan reads this, what is this is a reference to?

Only a nerd would know what an MMORPG is… Actually I like MMORPGs but I prefer RTSs. Oh, better yet, FPSs!

“Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game.” *fistbump*

Spencer, that is a mistake make gamers make. They go get food. While I am the first person to acknowledge the benefits of ingesting foods, doing so while playing MMORPGs might result in more frequent visits to in-game graveyards.

A boat on a coffee table? Now I’ve seen everything…

“Oh my God, it’s Adam! He wants to videochat! Be cool!” Carly, when is Freddie not cool?

I would like to take a few minutes of your time to talk about the TV in Carly’s room. It’s awesome, and I bought one with relatively the same size.

One note. As much as I love Miranda Cosgrove and recognize her talent as an actress, I think that when she says “you did?” was bad. I think she was supposed to be surprised, I mean, her crush just saw her perform in her weekly webshow and she’s not that surprised?

Burning a pickle…

Oh, come on, Carly. Freddie just wants a little recognition…

“Nice hat!”

“Leave the hat.” “No, I need to wear it!”

Now Carly sounded a bit desperate… But she’s not! This is a direct contrast with iSpeed Date, in which she was desperate, but didn’t want to sound it.

Carly knows about the Creddie shippers…

*rubs hands together while looking around the room* …WHAT?? We’re the nervous ones?? Come on!!! We’ve been fighting Creddiers from day one! And they are the nervous ones!!

Small note: Adam is a Seddieshipper. You know why I say this? He didn’t know the name of the ship, but when he did, he said, “got it.” Which means he wants Sam and Freddie together.

“So you and Freddie definitely aren’t together?” “God, no!” Tremble before the power of this statement, Creddieshippers!

Adam asked Carly out, but her busy schedule is in the way.

“Swear?” Look out for words with double meaning…

Spencer comes back with the cheese.

“I told you to never sneak up on me when I’m thinking about boys!” How is Spencer supposed to know when you are thinking about boys?

Spencer arrives with a bombshell. He’s going to Webicon.

Turns out he wants to win a stume contest (stume is cool talk for costume). So basically, he’s gonna be a cosplayer.

PILLOW FIGHT!! But Spencer, she’s unarmed…

»»» Transition to: Bushwell Plaza, Shay’s kitchen «««

Spencer is measuring his stume and making all necessary modifications…

Like any responsible adult, Spencer asks the kids how was school.

“Aced my Physics test.” “Nice.”
“Got an A on my World History report.” “Good boy.”
“Had egg salad for lunch.” “Tastee”.

Look how Freddie became psyched about the stume (by now, it sounds lame.)

Is it possible that two girls who never had any contact with World of Warlords do not know who Aruthor is? Yes, it is.

Aruthor is the greatest warrior in the entire realm of World of Warlords. His powers are equaled by no other. So Aruthor is a parody of Arthas. And the only match for Arthas is the Lich King. I take it that’s what Aspartamay’s based on. Yes, I’ve played the game.

Again, is it possible that two girls who never even heard of World of Warlords don’t know why can’t they battle. But I get the feeling it’s about to be explained.

Freddie is terrified of Sam. Just one look from her and he starts shivering. Well, not shivering, but he does get afraid.

Hoobscher fyords. Again Ben Heubsher is mentioned. Don’t we all love iCarly’s script coordinator?

“It’s so weird how you guys don’t have girlfriends…”

Farquar dimentional plane. Got it.

A battle so volatile it could destroy the multiverse… UHHHHH…

I’m a sucker for everything that includes multiverses. I think it’s the possibility of exploring new… oh, you don’t care…

Diet soda for the win!

Jewels on the butt flap? New level of nerdiness, Spencer Shay.

Go get a sponge, Sam…

»»» Transition to: bird’s eye of Seattle «««

Again, I am forced to interrupt this, because I noticed something.

Dan took images from Comic-Con and modified some logos to make them look like Webicon. I said some, because there are some which show clearly it’s from Comic-con. But a good try nonetheless, Dan! Here is an image that proves it:

The cast has arriveth. I mean arrived. They meet Corbin Davis, Webicon VIP liaison. What that means, I don’t know.

Nora is brought up again. She had a chicken…

Uh… smoke effects… Nice.

You are Aruthor! But even Aruthor can be hit by automatic doors.

“You have a couple of broken steam pipes over there.”

“Is there a bathroom I can use?” “Right next to the iCarly conference hall.” Incredible! Just as I have foreseen! Take a look:Well, it’s a little far off…

“We have a conference hall?” “I am Aruthor!”

Freddie was kidnapped by the iCarly fangirls! Hurry, Sam, go and save your friend. Right now he’s just your friend.

Sam has landed right on top of Freddie. You hear him scream…

“Those girls will tore you to pieces!” “I know! Woo-hoo!!” There Freddie goes, willingly, into the middle of the crazy fangirls…

—Commercial Break—

I already saved him once, that’s all he gets from me.

We all know you’re Aruthor, Spencer…

“Give me my longstaff, I made it.”

Apparently Dan saw the Simpsons fragment called Man Getting Hit By Football.

“Tragedy!”

“Here’s your nerd stick.”

While Spencer signs up for the stume contest (it still sounds lame…), Adam shows up!

Gibby’s joining the cast, along with his brother…

»»» Location: Parking lot «««

Gibby, Guppy and their grandpa are on the car “on their way” to Webicon.

Mr. Gibson has fought 7 years on a 2-year war in Korea. He met a lady there.

“My pants are too tight!” I agree with you, Guppy!

Mr. Gibson can’t eat corn, do da, do da.

And they’re still parked…

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

Hoobscher Fyord Vs. Pernicious Berm. The fight all the World of Warlords would rather avoid.

“Your costume is so level 90!” “Epic stume” (It STILL sounds lame…)

Why is it so hard to believe that Spencer made the costume himself?

“I think I’m cocky enough…”

Webicon visitors are advised not to get too excited about any of the panels, it may be hazardous to your health.

The epic encounter between Aruthor and Aspartamay has already made casualties: one teen has fainted.

For the first time since the creation of the game, Aruthor and Aspartamay meet face to face…

»»» Location: iCarly Q&A panel «««

Adam is being redirected to the iCarly Q&A panel.

We see Stacey, who is a little emotional.

Next, it’s Craig and Eric. They’ve been in line for two hours.

With only a few minutes until the Q&A begins, Sam has disappeared.

But lo and behold, here she comes, with a drink in her hand.

Fat Shake. “Brand new from the good people who bring us Fat Cakes.” The truth about these is, they are made from low fat Fat Cakes.

The Q&A is just about to begin.

“My name is Adu!” Congratulations, Adu! You just lost an amazing oportunity to be quiet. Another Simpsons reference.

“I have a question. You guys are awesome!” Another one, Adu.

Girl in pink shirt: 93 sound effects for only 6 buttons, how is it possible?
Answer: The remote is programable. And it seems that Craig and Eric had a wager going on…

From now on, I’m gonna call Stacey “The girl with the bow on her hair.”

Stacey was cured of her speech issues but had a relapse. I know what you mean, girl…

Say what? Stacey’s a Creddieshipper?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO00000000000000ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo00000000000000000000000…

As soon as Stacey announces her ship, another guy starts booing her and shouting “Seddie!”. First, a note. Not all Seddieshippers are like that. I, for one, am not like that. I respect Creddie, and other ships.

“Carly and Freddie, what are the circumstances of your romantic relationship? Details, please.” Gee, next time, try being a bit more direct, okay, Stacey?

What? They are the ones that supposedly are in a romantic relationship (which they aren’t, by the way), but you think you know more than them.

Also, something fun to notice is that the PearPad girl has pictures! PICTURES!! What do they prove? Absolutely nothing. Look, we see that the only first two pictures are Creddie-ish. The rest is Baby Spencer, alone and with his maid, Gibby, Spencer, and actual iCarly photos. We even see the knowing smile Spencer does from iNevel, you know when Sam and Freddie are fighting (I think this description didn’t help much…)

Even Man-boobs agrees with Stacey and the PearPad girl. By the way, the website proves nothing. Nothing on the website points towards Creddie.

Oh, Adam’s getting angry… You won’t like him when he’s angry.

You are a bad girl, Sam… You know that’s not true and you still say it? Oh, it’s just for the laughs. In that case, okay.

That did it. Not only did Sam cause an all-out fan war, it completely crushed Adam’s heart…

It may be fun, Sam, but it’s wrong.

END OF PART ONE.

»»» Commercial break «««

The fan war Sam created still ensues. And Corbin is trying to calm the fans down…

Sam offered Freddie her Fat Shake…

Freddie knows Carly likes Adam, and is not upset about it. He’s over Carly, peoples!!!

Oh, Sam, now you’ve done it good…

She jokingly announced that Creddie was true and now Adam’s heartbroken…

Why would a shuttle come pick Adam up?

Why would she need an extension cord?

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

Aruthor and Aspartamay are judging each other’s costumes.

Aspartamay’s saying Aruthor’s costume is good, for an amateur… Oh, it is on in a matter similar to that of Donkey Kong.

Oh, Spencer’s costume is based on the beta version of Aruthor…

“What’s wrong with my jewels?” This has so many interpretations…

And now they are poining the flaws on each other’s costumes.

This is a sign that new methods of thought are reaching new ways of being acknowledged. Even videogame characters are vegetarians…

»»» Location: Inside-Out Burger «««

Mr. Gibson wants soup. So he goes to the Inside-Out Burger.

With Guppy shouting “French fries!”, and Mr. Gibson not knowing who’s speaking through the drive-through, it turns out it’s a painful morning…

“I’m hearing the voices!!” Oh, Guppy…

»»» Location: iCarly Q&A panel «««

Next question is from Craig, who hails from San Diego.

Only a nerd would reference Stargate in a regular conversation.

Adu, it doesn’t matter how many times they say they aren’t dating each other, you guys can’t get it through your thick skull of yours…

I’d like you guys to remember an older time, when the iCarly cast went to Land of the Rising Sun…

When the Nakamura Hotel clerk claimed they were on honeymoon and he got slapped? Well, look at him now. Dozens of fans claiming he’s dating Carly and yet, not a single smile. I’m sorry for saying this, Creddie fans but Freddie’s just not that into Carly.

They were kicked out of the TCAs? Why? Oh… Not even iCarly is safe from Justin Bieber…

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

And now Aruthor and Aspartamay are in a healthy swap of insults…

I like how Steve (I call Steve to the guy who’s playing Aspartamay) breaks character to say “Okay, seriously, dude, you take that back right now.”

Now we get to see an epic showdown between Aspartamay and Aruthor.

And those teen in the middle, “the prophecy…”

The epicness of this battle has to be expressed in it’s original form. In text.

Aspartamay: You maggot, you fool, know you not what you say, prepare to be PWNED by Aspartamay!
Aruthor: You look like you’re hungry, so taste the blade of Aruthor!
Aspartamay: Your blood, it will boil, your flesh I shall burn into eternal damnation, but I guess that you’ve earned it!
Aruthor: You will beg for mercy, when I own you in the FACE!
Aspartamay: I’ll thrust my sword through your lily white gullet, you’ll look like a troll with a chambermate mullet!
Aruthor: You emanate a stench so foul that when you’re near it makes me HOWL!
Aspartamay: I’ll bleed ye dry and ye shall cry, (imitating a baby crying) Wah wah wah wah, ba ba ba ba!

And a song ensues. And then a fight.

And then we’re back on Gibby’s car.

Gibby’s way of manipualating his grandpa deserves applause.

»»» Location: iCarly Q&A panel «««

Sam returns with Adam tied up.
A small fun fact *hears faint voice* Well it is fun to me! When Phoebe, Steve and I went to Webicon, we were supposed to cover the event live, but we lacked a very important cable. One that Steve forgot. So, when he was holding a camera at this time, when Sam passed by him, she punched him in the nose. Hey, see it on the bright side. At least you got a free souvenir…

He was resisting… okay.

When Sam calls them people they don’t respond, but they answer by fans of iCarly.

Sam has 2 announcements:
– having a Fat Shake is like sucking heaven through a straw.
– She was joking about Carly and Freddie.

Adu’s comment is remarkable. “She pulled our collective legs!”

Sam and Freddie FOR THE WIN!!! <- This is both a quote and a statement said by me.

The girl who asked the first question is a Seddieshipper…

Another fan war…

Stool!

— Commercial Break —

The second fan war rages on…

Sam’s family reunions seem to be pretty funny…

We know that, Corbin.

“A nerd riot can last for days! Most of these people don’t have jobs or lives to go back to.” So basically the insanest-most-hardcore shippers are uber-nerds? I agree…

“STOP IT!!! POR FIN!!”

That guy who yells “You lie!”… Why is he all formal?

And the riot resumes…

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

Aruthor and Aspartamay are still at it…

That nerd as referee cracks me up!

It has come down to this: Longstaff vs. wristballs.

»»» Location: Mr. Gibson’s car «««

Mr. Gibson is fighting with the drive-through guy…

Where’s his soup?

And the drive-through guy is pulled out of the winder.

»»» Location: iCarly Q&A panel «««

The riot seems neverending…

And Carly’s solving a Rubik’s cube. She got one side done.

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

The leaders of the Hoobscher Fyords and the Pernicious Berm are still fighting…

Aruthor’s getting pwned!

Total pwnage!

It’s not a rock, it’s a piece of cement.

Spencer has chlorene in gas form…

Bring the tenacious floggers!

»»» Location: iCarly Q&A panel «««

Corbin called the chief of security.

Who is stupid enough to hold a live flare??

That is the whole reason reason iCarly was created… To share fruit.

Creddiers: “Let’s get this guy because apparently he is the only thing in the way of Creddie, even though we have no reason whatsoever to attack him!”

Carly’s indifference is incredible. “Did anyone understand what I was trying to sa… oh, forget it…”

This is what I don’t understand. We Seddiers have nothing against Adam, but he’s being poked by Seddie paddles.

“He belongs to them now…”

He won’t forget it…

»»» Location: World of Warlords panel «««

The tenacious flogging continues.

“The kids from iCarly approacheth.”

“He’s not my friend, he’s mean…”

“Aruthor has a sister?”

“Your costume’s lame!” Good one, Spencer!

The mighty Aspartamay is going down with a bitten thumb?

You’ve snatched his browny jewel. So he’s gonna die.

He could reanimate, but it would take the power of all 99 mages and Sam doesn’t want it.
Look how Sam bends Freddie’s will with just 4 words…

“Can we go home now?” “After we blow the horns of our forefathers, symbolizing the vanquish…”
“We’re going home!” “I’ll get the car.”

At long last, Gibby arrives at Webicon. He had to lie to get here.

My 2 dollars: This episode was really funny, congrats to Jack Black for another successful performance. The promos were VERY misleading. I was mislead by them, I admit it. But the goal of iCarly is to make people laugh. And I get that everytime my 4-year-old cousin starts randomly shouting “Gibby!”

I recommend you guys to read this blog post by Dan: Here

Oh, I almost forgot… I have found scriptures that predict what happened these last few days…

They were written in a ancient e-book.

They go as follows:

“The epic event took place and followers around the globe and Wisconsin desired to see which side reigned victorious, the Fram or the Frarly. But in the end, the battle was not solved. So, the followers rose against the Creator and demanded to know why their questions had not been answered. The Creator saw this and posted on his blog. And the followers of the Creator saw that it was good.”

In case you can’t tell, the text above was written by me.

Ever since this site existed, I’ve been trying to find a catchphrase I could call my own.
I am proud to say I have found it.

Seddie, it’s not a ship, it’s a lifestyle.

Live from Webicon, It’s the RobSp1derp1g Something Something Show!

Hello, folks! As you can see that I’m not in my usual deep-underground-location-unknown-super-secret evil lair of doom. Oh, that’s right, you can’t see it… Anyhow, me and both my assistants, Phoebe and Steve (I had to hire him again… I needed help with this.) decided to pack our bags and fly across the pond to the exotic paradise location that is, brace yourselves… Wisconsin.

Why is that? Because we’re covering the Webicon 2010 convention (it is kinda redundant, ain’t it?). I have received information that the iCarly cast was going to be here, and true enough, I’m looking at their panel. It includes a giant replica of the main page of iCarly.com. (security guard shows up.) Excuse me for a moment, please. Phoebe, please hold the camera. *faint voices* Excuse me, sir, may I see your pass? *Rob* Certainly, here it is! *guard* What about them? *Rob* Oh, they’re with me. I vouch for them. *guard* Okay, go ahead. By the way, I’m a fan of your blog. Awesome job! *Rob* Thank you! It’s always nice to meet a fan. Phoebe, camera, please. Thank you.

*moves camera* As you can see, there are a lot of panels here. There’s one for the game that has reached over 12 million players worldwide: World of Warcraft, I mean World of Warlords. Yeah, that’s totally what I meant. Also, this year we have a newcomer. We have… a bakery here? What is this “Schneider’s Bakery“? Are they the catering company that was hired? OH, it’s owned by DanWarp, the guy who created Drake and Josh and Victorious… What is he doing here? There’s also a panel for Galaxy Wars, which is good, because they’re releasing a special edition of all 4 movies of the trilogy in the new Purple-ray format.

That pretty much concludes this small cover of Webicon. Be sure to be sure of something. And don’t forget! What are you supposed not to forget? Oh, Webicon starts tomorrow, November 19th, at 8:00 PM!

Also, there are a bunch of people who are conspiring to trend #Seddie tomorrow on Twitter. They’re good people, help them out!

See you here.

Incredible news!!

Hello, my wonderfully amazing group of people who like to read this blog-thingy!! If you’re here then you must have somehow found my site. I’m guessing it was either from Google or something.

This blog recently got the attention of certain people who live within this wonderful universe. I’m talking about someone who’s admired by many people the world over, and no, I’m not talking about Ryan Seacrest (but how awesome would it be if Ryan, I’m sorry, Mr. Seacrest actually saw this blog?)

The person I’m talking about is none other than, Mr. Warp, Dan Schneider!

That’s right, folks! Our good friend will be reading my review on the upcoming episode iSam’s Mom!

I know you all take my word for it, but there are a few skeptical people who won’t believe my words. To them, I say this:

“A picture is worth a thousand words.”

This is huge, I know. for a blog that is only 1 month old, this is, as the title says, incredible news!

Also, I have a Seddie contest going on and would like more participants. More info on it here.

So, my friends, get ready, the next review is going to knock you guys out. A RobSp1derp1g promise.

Until the next review, have a Seddietastic Seddietember and have your daily Seddie fix!

PS: Oh, and for those who care, Phoebe returned yesterday. So, the next review will have lots of sound effects!!

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