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iGoodbye Review

RobSp1derp1g, blogger, inventor, deep-thinker. Searching for a way to tap into the hidden strenght that all humans have. Then, an accidental overdose of Internet memes alters his body chemistry. And now, whenever RobSp1derp1g grows angry or outraged, a startling metamorphosis occurs.

“Ow! I’m angry for no reason whatsoever!”

The creature is driven by rage and pursued by an investigative reporter.

“Mr. Griffin, don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”

The creature is wanted for a murder he didn’t commit. RobSp1derp1g is believed to be dead. And he must let the world think that he is dead, until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him.

And so we come to this, the last iCarly: iGoodbye.

I will admit, these words are hard to write. Not because iCarly is ending (well, a little because iCarly is ending), but because I have MASSIVE writer’s block. But enough with the sad stuff. If we’re gonna go out, we might as well go out in a blaze of glory!

Shall we get this started?

»Scene 1 – Ridgeway High«

So far, nothing points that this is the last iCarly episode. How could it, it just started…

Carly is by her locker when Sam approaches with a piece of wood with a bunch of nails. It can be used for a multitude of things, though the main use is the scratching of backs, while tearing clothes apart. And Carly’s not Sam’s first visit, as Freddie will now demonstrate.

Freddie’s “phone” is ringing. That’s no phone, that’s a chocolate bar! You thought I was gonna say space station, didn’t you? All joking aside, my brother has a smaller version of that phone.

That phone has a dual-quad-core processor? Can you run… let me think of a game… Oh, Assassin’s Creed 3 on it?

So, it’s a Samsun Gemini MaxPad. The name makes it sound like a high-tech version of women’s hygiene product…

Gibby is right to laugh…

Apparently, Col. Steven Shay can’t take his daughter to a militar-endorsed dance.

“Big phone…”

By now, you should have somehow realized that there are references aplenty to iCarly’s first episode, iPilot.

»Opening Credits«

The last iCarly’s opening credits. These ones have been especially tuned to show you how the kids have grown, how far they’ve come.

»Scene 2 – Bushwell Plaza – Shays’ Apartment«

Spencer is fixing a motorcycle. A particular detail about this motorcycle is that it was not designed to be ridden while playing children’s card games!

Does Mama know her bikes?

Of course, it had to be for Socko’s cousin, Ryder. I wonder if we’ll ever see Socko…

Audrey? Spencer’s girlfriend of the episode?

Gibby’s line here does not surprise me at all. But I do wonder why he has a lamp on his hand…

1 - Oh Gibby

Only Gibby would see an exercise machine in a motorcycle.

Lucky Spencer! He got himself a date with one of his exes. But he didn’t run over this one.

“Audrey, the most important girlfriend I’ve ever had. The only girl I’ve ever… really been in love with.” Cue Gibby’s ‘aw’.

2 - Aw
Spencer’s meeting Audrey at the airport. In times like these, it is wise to remember the words of famous TV psychologists such as, Dr. Lance Sweets and Dr. Kevin Venkataraghavan. In a nutshell, they said that when you are reunited with someone from your past after a long period of time, you will inevitably start acting as you did when you were around that person. This theory has been proven LOTS OF TIMES.

“Hey, where’s the teenage girl that actually lives here?” Keen perception, Spencer! I don’t know.

Gib, Sam was talking! Come on!

I don’t know what to say to Gibby’s response…

Gibby wants a new head. I think a new head won’t solve his problem…

Jewish action figures?

For some reason, I think that Sam’s interest in the bike is unnatural…

»Meanwhile, at the Groovy Smoothie«

Carly is busy looking at her pear-shaped phone with a sad look on her face.

T-Bo’s a good listener…

»Scene 3 – Back at Bushwell Plaza«

Sam and Spencer is helping Spencer with the bike.

And Spencer is telling Sam how he met their mother. Sorry, how he met Audrey.

Icky girl named Velma who smelled like cheese.

“I’d love to date a guy who smelled like cheese…” Excuse me for a moment, guys. Phoebe, I want you to order 30 cans of cheese spray. I want them yesterday.

Lewbert, it’s been too long!

Spencer’s been exposed!! Kill the germ! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!

What? It’s the wrong choke knob?

Don’t give up, Spencer. “Show me that Spencer smile.”

3 - Spencer smile

… I don’t know what to say…

Hey, look! Carly has arrived!

“Dadless?” Col. Shay isn’t dead, he’s just busy…

Ah… So that’s why she’s upset…

“Look who’s getting all elderly?” I have the PERFECT image for this line, hang on.

Arthritis-Five

And so, Spencer takes the proverbial bullet for his younger sister, by ditching on his old girlfriend… Now that’s love… or a screenplay, one or the other…

Spencer’s taking Carly to the Father-Daughter Dance… we haven’t seen the last of this…

Come on, Lewbert, that’s just mean…

»Commercial Break«

»Scene 4 – Shays’ apartment«

The references to the show itself keep popping up, now it’s the song from iGet Pranky, “The Joke Is On You”.

Carly left home in her PJs. I’ve heard legends, myths, if you will, of things worse than that…

Spencer’s sick. I’m not saying it was Lewbert, but it was Lewbert.

And to fight the fever, a prolonged stay at a place called FreezingRefrigeratorheim. It feels better than you’d think, though it is highly discouraged by most doctors.

Tuna casserole for breakfast? I’ve definitely seen worse…

»Scene 5 – Green Meadow Mall«

For some reason, I love the name.

Dan Schneider, a master of subtlety, decided to stop trying. Just look at the names of the stores… Get-a-head, Just In Case… I was expecting something, more thought-provoking…

Freddie’s brick is immediately recognized by the shopkeep (yeah, I said shopkeep) of Get-a-head.

“She must hate you.”

They sell Penny-Ts at Green Meadow Mall… It’s supposed to be near Chicago… I’m sorry, Seattle. I’ve no idea why I wrote Chicago.

Gibby wants a replica of his head. In the Mission Impossible series, this would be done by taking pictures of the head of the Gibby and create a replica out of a material which name I cannot recall at this time. Basically, at Get-A-Head, they do the same thing, but they require the Gibby to lie perfectly still for 2 hours…

“Cabeza duplicada.”

And here is one of iCarly’s greatest mysteries: Freddie’s Spanish ramblings… And as soon as he starts to explain, is interrupted by the shopkeep at Get-A-Head.

Why would anyone bring a weasel to their workplace?

“Dude, go easy on the weasy…” I think now’s the perfect time to add a Ron Weasley joke. Can’t think of any…

Gibby’s an animal lover. *rolls eyes* That came out wrong…

Good luck finding a case for your brick, Freddie.

»Scene 6 – Shays’ Apartment«

Spencer is on the couch, sick with Lewbert germs.

Everyone knows that the cure to the flu is to lift your shirt up.

Sam got herself a Tub o’Chicken.

Meekalito is calling Spencer. Don’t know who Meekalito is? He’s Dan in a costume.

BTW, Spencer doesn’t understand the concept of bargaining or negotiation… He’d be an amazing hostage negotiator… You can tell by the look on your face that I’m joking…

»Scene 7 – Just in Case, the kiosk«

That’s not a phone case…

The only case that fits the brick is a man-purse.  (Attention, the link is NOT SAFE FOR WORK! Okay, it contains the word “F***in’, as in ‘kidding me’”)

“Don’t you think it looks kinda feminine?” No!! What kind of idea is that, Freddie? Indiana Jones wore one! (But yeah, it does look kinda feminine…)

It is perfect for the MaxPad (which still sounds like a women’s hygiene product), but not for Freddie. I mean, what will the fangirls think?

»Scene 7 – Meekalito’s Motorcycle Repair and Rock Shop«

4 - Dan

When I first saw the episode, I didn’t recognize Dan as Meekalito… But then again, he had to make a cameo… It’s tradition…

A choke knob for a ’64 Sterling, coming right up!

“These are my rocks…”

5 - Schneider's Lubricants

Schneider’s lubricants? So that’s why Spencer sets everything on fire!

Now, Sam knows how to negotiate.

And so, she leaves Meekalito talking to his rocks…

»Scene 8 – Get-A-Head«

The head of the Gibby has been fully scanned and now they can begin the replication proper.

There’s Freddie with his new manpurse.

Lookie, lookie, it’s Mrs. Benson and Mrs. Lillien!

Manpurses… also worn by women…

»Meanwhile, at Bushwell Plaza…«

Spencer’s ready for the dance, but he’s still sick. And his temperature is 103…

I’m hot blooded, check it and see.
I got a fever of a hundred and three.
Come on baby, do you do more than dance?
I’m hot blooded, hot blooded.

Sorry guys, it had to be here.

And Spencer comes crashing down… but still dancing… now, that’s hot blooded!

»Commercial Break«

»Scene 9 – Bushwell Plaza«

Carly and Sam are sitting on the couch eating comfort food.

I don’t know what to say at this segment…

»Meanwhile, at Get-A-Head«

Freddie’s manpurse is ringing. And it’s Sam.

Look, if you please at the following image:

6 - Twothings

There’s Freddie on the left, and Sam on the right. Nothing weird, right?

Look at Freddie, please. Sam just told him she has to talk to him about something important, and Freddie asked her if she wanted to get back together. Direct your attention to his eyebrow. Also, I don’t think this is the last we’ve seen of Seddie… And here’s the funny part: the manpurse, it has one job. Making sure his brick is stolen.

Freddie to the rescue!!

Also, there are people who never saw a Gibby with his head trapped in a glass container.

And the Gibby runs around…

»Scene 10 – the Apartment«

Spencer is feeling better.

Sam fixed the bike?

So much work for nothing?? I demand satisfaction! *glove slap*

And that’s how Sam got her motorcycle. Hopefully, she won’t play any card games on it… That would be stupid.

»Scene 11 – Get-A-Head«

Gibby got a head and a weasel, for free!!

»Scene 12 – The Apartment«

Carly’s, in the words of Mrs. Eriksen, abusing herself. She’s looking at the wallpaper of the Father-Daughter Dance.

Sam took her bike for a test drive… Is she even allowed to drive? Is she old enough? Sam, not Jennette.

There’s a ring on the door…

And I wish I saw Sam’s face on this situation…

7 - Suited up

“Nice…”

And he STILL carries the manpurse…

“Miss Shay…”
“May we escort you to the dance?”

But she breaks into tears…

Seriously, what did they do?

Here’s the big, huge, GINORMOUS reveal of the episode: Here comes Tom Hanks, as foretold by the internet collective consciousness known as Twitter.

8 -A few things wrong with this image:

  1. This isn’t Tom Hanks.
  2. When someone inserts the key in the keyhole, you would hear. Unless you leave the door open, and who’d leave the door open?
  3. Did I mention that man in not Tom Hanks?

If you would allow me, I will post two snippets of Dan’s Fun Facts of this episode.

During the first season of iCarly, I had the basic idea for the very last episode.

I knew I wanted Carly and Spencer’s dad, Colonel Shay, to return, for a special event.  I knew that Carly would be missing her dad terribly, and that he would make a surprise return home.  That’s how I wanted the series to end.

I had this vision of the front door opening, Carly hearing her dad’s voice, turning, breaking into a huge smile, yelling “Dad!” and running into his arms.  I saw that scene in my head back in 2008.  So, it was kind of surreal when we filmed that very scene, in 2012.

Also, this:

And here comes one of the most awesome, magical moments in the history of iCarly.  It gives me chills every time I watch it.  I had this moment in my brain – the return of Carly’s dad, and her reaction – way back in 2008.  And now, it finally happens here.  I wonder if you will feel choked up (in a good way) like I do, every time I watch this moment.

There is a saying that goes: if you can see it in your mind’s eye, you will grasp it in your hands. This right here is an AMAZING example of the power of the Law of Attraction. But this post isn’t about that.

“So, Spencer’s not your dad?” Isn’t it obvious by now, Gibby?

The usual greetings occur.

We have known, for 109 episodes, that Spencer is just a kid in a grown man’s body. Here’s the undeniable evidence.

9 - Spencer

Even Col. Shay agrees with me, that manpurse is incredibly feminine…

»Commercial Break«

»Scene 13 – the Apartment of the Shays«

Crazy hat party occurring. Yet another reference to iPilot.

T-Bo introduces himself to Col. Shay. He asks if T-Bo’s dating Freddie’s mom. T-Bo chokes at the thought.

What? Col. Shay is already leaving? I admit, I know what that is like…

Italy? It’s a dream of mine to go there…

Italian smoothies… They do use gelato.

And what convinced Carly to go to Italy is the thought of Italian guys.

One last iCarly.

Meet Colonel Steven Shay of the USAF. *salutes*

Baby Spencer freaks many people out…

A people’s favorite: “The Cowboy and the Idiot Farm Girl Who Thought That The Cowboy’s Mustache was a Squirrel”.

An iCarly PSA (Public Service Announcement).

Carly is making a See-Ya-Later speech. Somewhere, a Nevel Papperman is looking at this and laughing manically and maybe he’s  spinning his chair in a celebratory fashion…

“I wanna say, to the fans of iCarly, thank you!” No, Carly, thank you!

“I’m Carly.”
“I’m Sam.”
“And this has been iCarly.” No words to describe this.

»Scene 14 – Carly’s Room«

Carly’s packing her clothing to go with her dad.

“We both know I’m a big, tall, goofy man-child.” Good, Spencer, the first step is admitting it.

“Being a grownup doesn’t mean you have to stop being silly and creative and fun.” Totally agreed…

»Scene 15 – Former iCarly Studio«

I want you to see this. Not for what it looks like, but for what it really is.

Freddie is packing up his high tech stuff.

10 - Body language

This is not the body language that precedes a romantic kiss.

But, perhaps more important, is this:

11 - John Hughes

This, my friends, is a reference to Mr. John Hughes. A director, writer, producer who passed away in 2009. But this short video featuring Emma Stone should provide a better insight.

»Downstairs«

The goodbyes. Always a hard part, especially for Jennette.

Gibby is the first one to give in to the tears…

Sam gives Carly the blue remote…

And, aboard an Aloft Airlines Airplane, Carly watches iCarly and sends us all in a trip down Memory Lane.

Freddie remembers how he practically appointed himself iCarly tech producer.

Spencer remembers the video squirrel… which has been on slow burn for 6 years, and only now has caught fire.

Sam remembers eating ham, while talking about iCarly.

In the very end, we see a car with the word iCarly on the license plate. Is that legal?

It’s been a blast doing this for you guys. This blog has done very well, for a small blog, with no previous experience in writing… And I owe it all to you guys. THANK YOU!!

This blog will stay online, I will only post it if I deem necessary.

You’ll still be able to find me on Twitter and on Facebook.

From RobSp1derp1g to you all, see you soon.

NEWS!! Good, bad, you be the judge!

Earlier tonight, something hit Twitter like a bomb… a link showed up on the micro-blogging site about Nickelodeon unveiling plans for total world domination, I mean, new episodes and shows. This news is accompanied with praises and cheers, as well as hatred and contempt.

Among the topics covered in the text in the link mentioned above, there are talks of the popular UK boy band One Direction having their own show, the 3rd installment of a FRED movie as well as 26 11-minute episodes of FRED: The Show.

But the thing that hits most of us is this: “…and a new Nickelodeon series from hit-maker Dan Schneider that will star Jennette McCurdy from iCarly…” Jennette McCurdy’s new show WILL come from the mind of the one and only Dan Schneider! This, however, does not mean that iCarly is ending… because…

“More new episodes of hit live-action hit series– iCarly, VictoriousBig Time Rush and Supah Ninjas.”

Despite what happens with iCarly, you know *points thumbs at self* this guy will be there to bring you the news you don’t want to know, and the reviews you get withdrawal symptoms for… Actually, people are starting to develop head and neck aches from withdrawal symptoms. True story… 

Here’s the link from PR Newswire:

http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/nickelodeon-unveils-plans-at-annual-upfront-for-more-than-650-new-episodes-across-every-genre-142666635.html

Please comment with your thoughts!

 

McCurdians, unite!!

My fellow McCurdians, this is the moment when we give back.

Go to this site and read what is written inside. Let’s give our #nerdqueen a reason to be proud of us!!

http://www.mccurdian.com/mccorner/McCorner/McCurdian_Projects/Entries/2012/2/15_Billboard_Project!_DATE_SET!.html

Generation Love Review

Since many people wanted to see Jennette’s new video and Nickelodeon didn’t comply, I decided to do something.

Post AND review Jennette’s video.

I’ll analyze the lyrics and the video itself.
Now, this is something that I have never done before so, if it’s bad, don’t sue me.

Here’s the video:

We start by seeing a city landscape, followed by a guy skateboarding and a girl holding a balloon with a heart on it.

“I found a picture of my mother in her bell-bottom jeans.
flowers in her hair, two fingers up for peace.
In that Polaroid she smiled,A grown up baby boomer
Maybe momma walked down the wild side, walking on the moon
What will they say about us”

The feeling I get from this part is that Jennette compared her mom’s generation it hers.
Her mom was influenced by the hippie movement (“Two fingers up for peace”)

“I’ve heard stories about my grandpa
child of the great depression
how growing up broke creates and deep and dark impression
He sits in a rocker, down at the veterans home
even when I go to visit he still rocking all alone
What will they say about us”

Here, she goes and gets another example of the clash of generations.
Her granddad must have fought on the WWII, (“He sits in a rocker, down at the veterans home”)

“They call us generation lost
Or generation greed
Or the connected generation to a plasma screen
or a generation why enough is not enough
Or maybe they’ll call us… generation love
Generation love”

This is what she thinks the older generations think about the current generation, a generation where everything is still not enough, where everyone is fending for themselves, where its youth is too dependent on technology, yet a generation that holds the ability to love unconditionally.

“We are children of divorce
Victims of dysfunction
We spell check of course
And GPS the proper junction
We’ve gotten pretty good
Shifting all the blame
But I think I hear an old song
Calling my new name
Generation love”

If I understood this part correctly, this generation has problems that the previous ones haven’t faced. And we became masters of saying, “it’s not my fault, it’s someone else’s. It always is.”

“Not generation lost
Or generation greed
or the connected generation to a plasma screen
or a generation why enough is not enough
Or maybe they’ll call us
Generation love”

Now she’s sure of how we’ll be known for the next ones.

“Ohhhh generation love
and when they open up our time capsule
a hundred years from now
Maybe they’ll look inside
And see we figured out
how to live for less and give ourselves away
just maybe they’ll call us,
Just maybe they’ll call us
Generation love”

Here is the “calling card” of our generation, so to speak. Give love in order to receive love. Like Bob Sinclair says.

“We are a brand new generation on the rise
Generation love
We are a brand new generation on the rise
Generation love
Ohhh generation love”

Honestly, I don’t think there are words to explain this line, so I’ll just copy it. “We are a brand new generation on the rise.”

Now, the video.

I don’t really watch that much music videos, but I know when one is well made. And this one is.
The city skyline, the people with the balloons, the people with the signs, all of that conveys a message. That this generation has so much to offer, and that the best is yet to come.

The camera work when Jennette in on the building is something that reminds me of videos by Christina Aguilera or Jennifer Lopez. A lot of movement, yet kept under control, to highlight the message the video conveys even more.

Overall, the young actress/singer did it again! (I’m only 3 years older than she is, I’m speaking like an old man.) She found a way to make a wake up call for our generation and, in my view, that’s what this song is.

You rock the Earth, Jennette! Hope to see you soon!

iHire an Idiot – Review

Hello, hello, hello! How are you, my dearest readers? How are you on this beautiful day?

Anyhow, I know my review for this episode is a bit late, but that is not my fault. I was stuck in this really difficult Professor Layton puzzle. You know the one…

Nevertheless, I’m here now and I’m ready to review iHire an Idiot.

Oh, and I promised one thing to my readers. I promised that I’d review this episode in Yoda talk. You know. That green midget from Star Wars, I’m talking about. Although, after analyzing this review, I concluded that the effect I intend to transmit is broken when the sentences are reversed, so, unfortunately, I’m afraid I have to break this promise…

So, without mentioning that guy from iStart a Fan War, here it is, the review for iHire an Idiot.

——————————————————
Location: Bushwell Plaza, Shay’s apartment
——————————————————

Freddie’s on the kitchen counter, Carly’s on the couch working, and Sam’s… also on the couch… sleeping.

Carly’s preparing the new iCarly. You don’t get to say that a lot…
Why would they need a big bucket, a nail gun and a large bag of baby peacock feathers… which Freddie already ordered.
Sam is supposed to get the nail gun. Nothing new there. I’m sure her uncle Carmine can prov… *hears knocking on door* I’ll get it. BRB. *goes to get the door* *returns shocked* Forget what I was going to say about Sam’s uncle Carmine there is no uncle carmine it’s all in my head.
But tell me, doesn’t Sam look cute when she’s asleep? Of course she does…

And Jennette got hurt a few days before they shot this scene. You can see a bruise below her knee. Look:

And what better way to wake your friend up than by tickling her conviniently-showing feet.

“We’re doing a webshow tomorrow night.” “iCarly?” Do you participate in another one?

She really doesn’t help…

9 hours to properly prepare a slice of pizza?

Pizza is a dish that requires taste… I saw it on Hell’s Kitchen…
Besides, there’s more to pizza than just bread and tomato sauce…
“… precision balance between red pepper flakes, parmesan cheese and garlic powder.” Is Freddie  related to Gordon Ramsay?

While he prepares the coffee table, he places his slice of pizza on the ground.
And when the phone rings, Spencer walks on Freddie’s pizza.

And he answers the phone with a not-too-common “Shallo?”.

Who’s Rosalinda?

“That pizza looks good.” “Yours.”

The webshow is getting too popular. The kids are getting very tired…

And why is Freddie touching Carly’s shirt?

And Spencer asks the question that set the plot into motion.
An intern.

“An assistant that works for free.” I have one of those! Here she is! Phoebe, can you come here please? *Phoebe shows up* See, I have an intern. Except I pay her. But she’s awesome, so I don’t mind paying her.

“Would it bathe me?” What?

Oh, so that’s why Melanie makes her sick. Remember, “always has clean hair”. Sam just doesn’t like to rub.

You gotta appreciate the irony. Sam, being Sam has a peace symbol and a horseshoe pendant on her neck.

Sniffmeajob.com. I’d go there, if it didn’t redirect to iCarly.com.

“This pizza tastes like shoebottom…” I wonder if it’s because you stepped on it a while ago…

Trivia time!
“Isn’t that a kind of bread?” “That’s ciabatta.” “That monkey from Galaxy Wars.” “No!”
What I want you to focus here is the third part. It proves Sam is a fan of Galaxy Wars.

Yet another phonecall? That phone is busy!

This one is from Grandpa Shay.

“Carly says she hates you…” Now, now, Spencer…

“This couch is getting too crowded…” So, the next logical step is to lie down on the living room table.

See? If your best friend lies on the coffee table, you can use her body as a boost to place your laptop.

“Old scutter…”

Dress up like a lady on the 4th of July? Who comes up with this kind of stuff?

Spencer has a deadline. He has until next week to publish his sculptures on a museum or, *dramatic sound* he’ll go back to law school…

“I can’t go back to law school! It was the worst 72 hours of my life!” I know, man, but it’s your own doing. You promised your grandpa…

This season of iCarly is revealing a bit more on the character’s background… First the goat, now some biker dudes…

—————-
Intro Sequence
—————-

————————–
iCarly set: Job interviews being held
————————–

I must say, I think I’d be the perfect intern for iCarly.

————Applicant File—————
Name: Stu Vernamin

Age: 16

Result: Promptly rejected by Sam

Reason: None whatsoever
—————————————–

“We’ll keep your resumé on file…” Oh, Gibbeh…

“You can’t cut people off in the middle of…” “Okay!” “Irony…”

Why the bloody hell is Stacey here? Is she stalking iCarly?
And notice how Carly is freaked out because of her. I think she hasn’t forgotten about the Creddie stuff… Oh, that’s right, the stuff in iStart a Fan War hasn’t happened yet… That’s what you get when you mix iCarly with time travelling.

Next is Brad.
Brad uses the same software as Freddie, and therefore the possible gap that could have existed is prevented right there. Plus, he makes fudge for people. And Sam loves that fudge.

“I’ll show you to the door.” You gotta love Gibby’s attempt to look badass. I get the feeling this isn’t the last time we see Brad…

Please note that Sam’s interest was perked when Brad spoke of the software he used. Techie Sam.

That is settled. iCarly has selected its newest int… What? There’s someone else?

And there comes Cort. A guy the girls consider hot, whose greatest achievement was learning how to tie his own shoes… on seventh grade… Gonna be tough to beat this guy, pause, not.

The girls decided for themselves… And Cort’s so stupid he didn’t understand that he was hired.

Remember the fudge?

“Are you a good dancer?” “The goodest!”

And they celebrate by asking Cort to show them what it means to be the “goodest” dancer in Seattle.
And who is that song from? Can anyone tell me? If it is from that kid who thinks he has talent, nevermind.

——————————————–
Location: Seattle Museum of Art.
——————————————–

If you could all follow me, we have here a exhibition on Traditional Postmodernists. Please notice the paradox this title conveys.

If you look at the door, you’ll see Spencer trying to smuggle the Bottle-Bot into the museum.

And when the museum curator shows up, all you need to do is say “I’m (your name here). It’s okay, I’m an artist.”

Whoa, wait a minute… Let me check if I heard this right.
I did… Spencer has a fan!

“…and I’d love for you to be represented in this museum…” “Yay.” “…but…” “Ohhh…”

And when things don’t work out, he tries to bribe the curator with a date.

Who’s Roy? Oh, that’s Roy.

Most security guards would have thrown Spencer out the door, and destroyed the Bottle-Bot, but Roy gave Spencer a ride to the door.

————————–
Location: iCarly set – Webshow about to begin.
————————–

90 seconds to go…

Lemonade in a bag… it’s original… I’m an old-fashioned man, I prefer those packets of juice they sell on the market, or if I’m feeling nostalgic, I’ll use my outdated and obsolete bottles.

Oh, Cort took some notes. Maybe he’s not that useless after…

He wrote them on Freddie’s PearPad… Which costs 800 US Life Points, I mean dollars.

Let’s see what he wrote:

1 – Be ready for webshow. – Okay, good.
2 – Believe in myslef. – Who, or what, is a myslef?
3 – Freddie just said something
4 – Carly looks hot today! Woot! – The guy is stupid, but he is certainly not blind.
5 – I am taking notes rite now.
6 – iCarly is a webshow… – Oh, I thought iCarly was something you cleaned your TV with…
7 – Bring cans of drinks – Cans, not bags!

Cort has a point, the notepads are much cheaper…

“In 5, 4, 3, 2…” “One!” Good to know he can count backwards from 2…

And now, here’s a little insight on the history of iCarly. Please listen quietly.

Carly met Sam. The drank from a filthy buckett. iCarly was born.

“Filthy bucket…” “I’m working!”

Here comes Gibby, in scubadiving gear…

“Fill me with feathers!”

And Cort just commited first degree murder. On a laptop…

Well, at least he offered to clean the laptop… after he killed it.

So, Cort’s an artichoke?

“Maybe we should fire him.” “Yeah, maybe we should…” They turn around and see Cort on Gibby mode.

“You know… everyone deserves a second chance!” “Cort deserves unlimited chances!!” Oh, God…

*Cue that trendy music whose performer is unknown to me.*

~~ Commercial time ~~

Location: Carly’s room.

Cort is jumping in the trampoline.
“95, 96, 97, 99, 100!!” Way to go, Cort! You proved my theory. You can’t count to 100 starting from 95.

The point of the exercise was to jump and count?

Oh, Gibby, you just got rejected by them again…

Cort, an errand boy? Bad idea…

A “todo”? Todo is portuguese for “whole”.

If they hired a younger intern, say about 10, the results would be way better…

Freddie just knocked the door.

Whoa! As they say on the old country, hoy! Who’s that hot girl who’s with Freddie?

“Who’s your… lady friend there?” Samantha Joy Puckett, are you jealous? I know this line alone will probably generate a lot of insults, but there’s one thing you can’t deny. She’s upset with the new girl’s presence. Her voice has been analyzed by over 2 scientists over at Seddie University.

Oh, the girl’s name is Ashley…

And she’s as stupid as Cort. Or is she? She is. Or is she?

Ashley found Carly’s not lost bag.

“I have a bed!” “Got one too!”

“What is going on here?” I don’t care if you don’t like it, but this is the most accurate sentence to describe what was going on there.

Half of the people nowadays are hired because of that, Sam…

Gibby got hit because he wanted fruit gum. Another thing to add to the “todo” list.

———————-
Location: iCarly studio
———————-

Cort is listening to his own heartbeat, with that thing…

It’s clearly rehearsed, but this happens more often than you think in real life. Freddie and Sam speak at the same time, again.

They ignore the fact that Freddie needs help. They go directly to Cort.

Ashley just arrived with a baby. A baby she took from a lady that was talking to Lewbert. Not even Sam would sweep that low…

The baby’s cute. Like a monkey. And monkeys go “meow”…. Okay, moving right along…

Oh, Carly and Freddie are having a serious conversation… It turned out to be something no one was expecting…

“That ‘feminidiot’”
“Your ‘himbecile’”
“Okay, that was clever wordplay.”

Can’t you agree both inters are both unimaginably stupid?

——————————————–
Location: Seattle Museum of Art.
——————————————–

“The name’s Shay. Spencer Shay.” All that’s missing are the high-tech gadgets James Bond (the TRUE JB) uses.

He’s even got an inside man, I mean, inside Gibby.

Please note that the sign reads “No flash photography.” and is aided by an image.

Gibby promptly starts taking flash photos. And this attracts the attention of Roy.

After a warning, Gibby keeps taking flash photos.

And Gibby applies a can of some material which name I don’t recall… This is just begging for a chase…

This chase gives Spencer enough time to get his Bottlebot into place.

Old ladies are so easily frightened…

————————–
Location: iCarly studio – Webshow rehearsal.
————————–

They’re shaving Gibby?

Look, Ashley has arrived. She was told to go get lunch for the gang. Instead she got herself some lunch. And according to her, it was “yummy”. Now, come on, who still says that?

And she has a memory span of a goldfish.

She’s happy to go sit on the floor…

“No deal!” What is this, Deal or No Deal?

“Cort’s too pretty to fire.” Oh, Carly…

Preparing the Raw Meat Storm! I think the name “Meaty-or Storm” would be better, but who am I?

The case of the Disappearing Meat! Call in Professor Layton! Or Sherlock Holmes! Or Shirley Holmes! Or even better, all of them!!

Wait, there’s no need for that… There’s the culprit. *points at Cort*

“We’re not supposed to?” How stupid can you be, Cort?

“They weren’t cooked…” Sam speaks from experience.

“Deal!” Again, is this Deal or No Deal?
“It’s time…” Like two mothers who refuse to let their kids go live their own life…

——————————————–
Location: Seattle Museum of Art.
——————————————–

Spencer is just adding the final details to his Bottlebot exhibit. A placard.

Grandpa appears.

A sculpture by Spencer in a museum? Could it be?

Stop importuning old people related to you, Spencer!

“In your face, you old scutter! Love you.” This episode broke the barrier for the uses of the word “scutter”.

“Dierdre!” Smooth, Spencer, smooth.

“Grandad, please. A little privacy…”

“I apologize, I had to do that.” “Just do it again.” “Yeah.”

————————–
Location: iCarly studio
————————–

Cort’s been fired? Hooray! I mean, oh no… whatever shall we do without him…

Cort’s been kicked out of college for being “dangerously stupid”. I think it’d been good to know that beforehand, don’t you?

They need Cort’s shirt. Just to see his abs. I bet you can grate cheese on those abs. Though the smell would tend to linger, something awful.

What a fun way to get fired. “Get out, Ashley!”

Wait, what? Sociology thesis?

Top of her class? Seattle Tech?

Freddie got you girls good!!

These words from Carly always make me laugh…

What’s up with the elevator?

Cort! What’s wrong?

“This is an elevator…” You’ve discovered gunpowder!

My 14 dollars: This episode was made to make us laugh, and that was achieved. Great episode!!

Also, please check this idea that my friends at McCurdian.com came up with. Click here!

Jennette McCurdy Radio Mob Project!

Hey guys! I’m here on behalf of myself to announce something that’s being done all around the McCurdian Network. It’s the Jennette McCurdy Radio Mob Project!

As you may or may not know, Jennette’s new single is coming out on iTunes on March 15th (just a few days away) and on radio on April 4th.

If you’re wondering what the Jennette McCurdy Radio Mob Project is, here’s a quick rundown:

Jennette is a great singer, but that alone won’t be enough for her to reach the success she deserves. If there ever was a time she needed her fans, that time is now!

Go to McCurdian.com. Everything you need to know is in that page.

Go to that site, arm yourselves with knowledge and support the NerdQueen!!

Jimmy’s dream is coming true!

Hey ya, guys! I know you’re still waiting for my iHire an Idiot review, but that’s not what brings me here today.

I don’t know if you remember Jimmy’s story. He’s a young man with Chrom’s Disease who wanted to meet Jennette.

Well, in an unexpected turn of events that can only be described as a miracle, he’s meeting her.

Here’s a DM that she sent him:

I’m really happy for him, despite the fact that more than once I was on the brink of pressing the Unfollow button…

The point being, If you believe something will happen with the whole of your being, that thing will happen.

RobSp1derp1g out!

Don’t worry, be happy! Jimmy’s story

My name is Rob. I’m 21 years old. For at least 7 of those 21 years I was bullied to desperation. My self-esteem vanished before those 7 years were gone. If anyone saw me, they wouldn’t be able to see me, they’d only see a guy on a routine, with a blank expression on his face…

While at first this post may sound like a suicide note, I can assure you this is not one.

I’ve never been that much of a religious man, but I do believe there is something above. While I call this entity God, others may not, so I prefer to play it safe and not argue about it.

For 4 years now, I’ve been into lots of stuff. Be it Pokémon, iCarly, Prison Break, Flashforward, you name it. For a while now, I’ve been online a lot, and when I say it’s a lot, it’s A LOT.

It is said “ask and you shall receive.” Well, that is true. I asked, and I received. A way out.

June 20th 2006. The day my life changed.

I was living a routine, like every other Sunday, when it was shown to me on the news. “The Secret.”

I wasn’t expecting much of it, but curiosity forced me to find out more about this Secret.

I researched and within 30 minutes, I had a copy of the book. (Won’t say how, you won’t like it.) It blew my mind apart.

Every single thing on my life made sense for the first time in a long while.

Then, I got the movie. Watched it. If my mind had been blown away before, this movie was like an atomic bomb to the pieces. It lifts you up. Really.

You see, The Secret tells you that what you imagine, given the proper emotion, will be obtained in real life. But you have to feel good NOW.

Let me back this up with quotes from famous authors.

“See the things that you want as already yours. Know that they will come to you at need. Then let them come. Don’t fret and worry about them. Don’t think about your lack of them. Think of them as yours, as belonging to you, as already in your possession.” Robert Collier (1885-1950)

In 1912, Charles Haanel described the law of attraction, The Secret, as “the greatest and the most infallible law upon which the entire system of creation depends.”

“The predominant thought or the mental attitude is the magnet, and the law is that like attracts like, consequently, the mental attitude will invariably attract such conditions as correspond to its nature.” Charles Haanel (1866–1949)

“The vibrations of mental forces are the finest and consequently the most powerful in existence.”Charles Haanel (1866–1949)

I made this post specifically for one thing. To prove to one person that his dreams are not impossible.

Previously, I said I’m online a lot. And I joined a lot of other fans of a TV show on Twitter. These fans are human beings, with hopes and dreams of their own. But there is one who sticks out, not for the best reasons.
This guy, who I’ll call Jimmy L., is one of the most hardcore fans of Star Wars I’ve ever seen. He says he’s in love with a actress, named Jennette McCurdy from a TV show we’re fans of. He constantly reminds us (me and other fans) that he wants to meet the actress/singer and announce his love to her.

He is 21, like me, but looks a lot younger, due to Crohn’s Disease. Had 2 near-death experiences, and his self-esteem is lower than the vaults of Fort Knox. I’m exaggerating, but it’s true.

Since March 2010 (when I joined Twitter), this guy has had a negative mindset about meeting Jennette. Every time she has an event on NYC, something happens, because in his mind he’s not ready to meet her.

Last December, he was radiant, he was on top of the world, because he had the possibility to go on a cruise Jennette was going on. As soon as he thought “What if I can’t go?”, the figurative-pedestal he was standing on collapsed. He was bummed beyond bumming standards.

Recently, he heard of another event in NYC. Guess what happened.

All this time, I’ve said one thing to him: “I’m gonna meet her. I’m gonna meet her.” He’s reaction was only, “How can you be so sure?” I believe it tore him apart inside. But there’s one thing. If there has been anyone beside you, Jimmy, it’s me. And I say to you, “how can you not? If you’re not sure of something, that will not happen!” Every time someone says to him, “be positive, don’t be like that,” his reply is, “how will be positive help me meet Jennette?” And another person says “Good things will happen if you’re positive.” Reply: “Will any of those good things help me meet Nettie?” His mindset is set on negativity by default, but he doesn’t do anything to change…

So here’s the bottom line. I’m not forcing you to believe me. I’m telling you to take a leap of faith, believe in yourself and try to be positive, Jimmy. Things will go a lot better when you’re positive.

Guys, I’m not asking for charity here. I’m just letting the world know of this guy because I’ve tried my best, and still accomplished nothing. Please, PLEASE, help me help him.

If this was something funny, I’d end with a joke, like I usually do, but it isn’t…

Please, if you want to contact me regarding this, please go here and e-mail me. Please make sure the subject line is “Don’t worry, be happy!” so I know what’s it about.

Thank you for your time.

McCurdian Network!

Big news, guys! I was approached on Twitter by Brian Kimskey, a big huge GINORMOUS (note the Caps Lock) fan of Jennette McCurdy, who had a proposition. I was asked if my site/blog could be featured in a  new site totally dedicated to Jennette which would be launched on Christmas Eve. The site is called McCurdian.com (not .net, .net is for losers) and it’s amazing!

And I’m glad to announce that as of this moment, RobSp1derp1g’s iCarly Reviews is now part of the McCurdian Network!


The McCurdian Network is a group of sites which feature and are featured on McCurdian.com. Some sites of that network are:
-RobSp1derp1g’s iCarly Reviews
-JustJennette.com
-Love Bilgerdunday’s Music

If you’ve got a site and you would like to see it featured on McCurdian.com, head over there and contact the owner.

RobSp1derp1g out.

Seddie. It’s not a ship, it’s a lifestyle.

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